Armed and Dadgerous
I know a lot of you saw our recent Dadliest Catch trailer which probably left some burning questions in your skulls. Why is Octodad so sad at the end? Where can I get that great song? Why did they misspell deadliest? Well, I’m here to answer all of your questions and give a little sneak peak on the controls and new gameplay elements we’ve added to the game. Also, because everyone keeps misreporting our title as Deadliest Catch we’ve changed it to the impossible-to-screw-up: Octodad: Armed and Dadgerous.
The most common feedback we got from the first game was, “Gee, these controls are frustrating, guys!” At first we thought, “Hey thanks mom, but that’s kind of the point you know? The controls are the game. If we took out the difficult controls we’d have to create 90 hours of dumb puzzles or something to waste the player’s time. Also, why am I even asking you, mom? Women over 40 don’t play video games, everyone knows that.”
But then we had a Kickstarter and made more money than all those silly rednecks who won the Mega Ball combined. Money changes everything. We’re not in college anymore. We can’t make awkward controls and nonsense characters just because we think it’s fun and innovative. We have to market test. We have to give people what they want and can’t go putting the car before the horse.
For the new game we’ve completely thrown out the old controls. We’ve created a set of controls only years and years of industry experience could produce, yet so unique we’ve patented them twice, so don’t go stealing it and using it in your Unity3D Sonic the Hedgehog Doujin. To move Octodad forward now all you have to do is press “W” for “Walk”! It’s that simple. You will love it.
But wait, that’s not it! If that’s the only controls we had your finger would get bored real fast. Octodad now has an innovative S.T.R.A.F.E. System (System To Roam Around Fairly Easily System). See, if you just press “A” and “D” you can make Octodad sidestep “lAft” and “righD” and we think it adds a whole new level of interaction that was missing from the first game. We’re debating adding an “S” command to let Octodad walk backwardS, but after frequent playtests we think most players aren’t ready for that much interaction.
Those are just the changes to walking, for “Arms” mode we made an even bigger evolutionary step. The first game was entirely inspired by Halo, but we didn’t have the time to properly implement plasma rifles, so we cut it at the last second and made a stupid physics-controlled tentacle arm instead for no good reason. Thanks to all the support of our Kickstarter donors, we can finally get rid of “physics” and “grabbing” entirely and instead have the mouse-look ink cannon tentacle we always wanted. Plus for the first time you can pick up entirely new weapons in the game, like the Dish Bazooka and BFG (Big Fondue Gun).
Also, a lot of you are dying to know the secret of how Octodad had human children with a human wife. He can’t possibly be the real father, right? Wrong, you didn’t actually think that did you? In the new game we definitely and conclusively reveal Octodad’s secret. OK, I’d be a dick to make you wait a year and pay real money to find out this secret. I’ll just tell you right now if you promise to like us on facebook and buy a t-shirt. Promise? Alright, here goes. Octodad is not an octopus. He’s not even a mutant that is a little bit octopus, but he is a real dad. You see, Octodad is a space alien, and just like Alf and that alien baby that looks suspiciously like Octodad from that cheap ripoff of Dinosaurs, Octodad’s species can breed with humans. It’s that simple. Sure, Tommy and Stacey are completely sterile, being intergalactic mules, but human features are the dominant genes so at least they don’t look like freaks, right?